Essay 340

Dove’s hype machine is running at maximum warp — and warping reality along the way.

The Unilever brand is currently promoting its upcoming Super Bowl commercial, using PR and spokespeople to proclaim the effort inspirational, powerful and provocative. Now mind you, the NFL extravaganza is still weeks away. Plus, most Super Bowl advertisers prefer to surprise the audience versus offering sneak previews and rave reviews. Hell, even Terrell Owens didn’t display such bravado so far ahead of the ceremonial coin toss.

Dove talks about debunking stereotypical beauty standards with its Real Beauty Campaign. Semi-ironically, the marketer’s obsession with its own messages goes well beyond narcissism.

The spot will allegedly seek to spark a debate about girls’ self-esteem. Not sure why Dove would try to reach girls through the Super Bowl. If the big game attracted that particular demographic, wouldn’t we see commercials for Barbie instead of Budweiser? But of course, this is not about reaching a target — rather, it’s about an advertiser taking an ego trip to Ford Field in Detroit. Clearly, there are no self-esteem issues at Dove headquarters.

The released images are particularly disturbing. Little girls stare directly at camera, accompanied by supers relating their apparent personal attitudes. A dark-haired kid “wishes she were blonde.” Another youngster “hates her freckles.” A third child “thinks she’s ugly.” Reports reveal the music track will be Cyndi Lauper’s True Colors, sung by the Girl Scouts Chorus of Nassau County, N.Y. Maybe the final communication will provide an innovative twist. But based on the early peek, it’s pretty fucked up.

Characters like Dora The Explorer and even Bratz dolls have done a better job of redefining beauty for our younger generations. Why does Dove think it’s a good idea to throw such negative feelings in people’s faces — and use little girls to do it?

Granted, there are infinite media forces messing with children’s minds. But the truth is, Unilever produces plenty of ads featuring the beauty standards Dove claims to be fighting. And Dove has hardly abandoned the gorgeous models in packaging and line extension advertising.

Please pardon the cynicism, but when the Dove commercial eventually airs during the Super Bowl, everyone is encouraged to rush to the bathroom and take a quick shit. Don’t worry — you won’t miss anything special.


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(Here is an example of Dove packaging maintaining the stereotypical beauty standard.)

Plus, to view an earlier Dove-inspired rant, click on the essay title above.