Essay 682

Keeping abreast with a MultiCultClassics Monologue…

• A group of moms in South Beach, Florida, held a “nurse-in” to protest a Starbucks that had allegedly kicked out a mother for nursing her infant. Starbucks had a different take on things, insisting the mother was expelled for changing diapers on a table inside the coffeehouse. If the mother’s side of the story is true, it would be a violation of a Florida law that supports a mother’s right to breast-feed her infant anywhere she’s legally allowed to do so. By the way, didn’t the original Starbucks logo feature a bare-breasted mermaid? Regardless, it’s highly likely that men witnessing the “nurse-in” made plenty of comments incorporating the word “grande.”


• A Broadway dancer (pictured above) charges she was sexually harassed, verbally abused and wrongfully fired because her breasts are too large. The woman was a performer in the Billy Joel musical “Movin’ Out” — plus, she was a C-cup when originally hired. She claims her breasts naturally grew to a D-cup after she gained weight, requiring refitting her costumes. This led to the problems detailed in her lawsuit. The woman is demanding $100 million. Billy Joel ultimately commented, “Under no circumstances would I ever have anyone fired for having breasts that were too large.” He then probably started singing “Just the way you are.”

• A New York singer is recovering from an attack that was probably a hate crime. Kevin Aviance, whose work has appeared on Billboard’s dance chart, was beaten by a group of men allegedly screaming anti-gay slurs. Aviance usually performs in drag, but was “dressed like a boy” when jumped. Guess a performer’s bra size really can lead to trouble in New York.

• There’s a new name for road rage: intermittent explosive disorder. Research shows 7.3 percent of the public may be affected by the disorder. The figure is significantly higher among advertising agency employees.

• A prominent Black activist from Los Angeles has joined The Minuteman Project, becoming one of the few Black participants. Ted Hayes is denouncing illegal immigration and proclaiming, “There was a time when Black folks did a lot of the work that illegal immigrants are taking. They came in here and undercut our salaries in their desperation for survival. … They say to an employer, ‘I can do that for half,’ and the ‘emplo[yer]-slavists’ says, ‘You’re on.’ Goodbye, Black man. … The only way we can get those jobs is to undercut their pay, and if we undercut their pay, my God … we’re in the White man’s slavery again.” Sounds like somebody’s suffering from intermittent explosive disorder.