Essay 697

Bling, bribes and bullshit in a MultiCultClassics Monologue…

• Jacob the Jeweler, bling supplier to stars like Madonna, Diddy and Allen Iverson, was arrested for allegedly laundering money with big-time drug dealers (Manhattan shop pictured above). “We are confident that once the government is advised of all the facts surrounding these issues that all of the charges against [Jacob the Jeweler] will be completely dismissed,” said the jeweler’s lawyer. In other words, the bling bribes are in the mail.

• Democrats voted to oust Rep. William Jefferson from the Ways and Means Committee while he’s dealing with the federal bribery investigation. After the vote, Jefferson said he’d spend the night deliberating on his next move. “I’m just going to go to my office,” Jefferson said. “I’m just going to wait and see.” And probably check out the contents of his office refrigerator.

• Two weeks ago, it was revealed that Blacks account for only 2 percent of UCLA’s incoming freshmen (see Essay 659). Now Black leaders are charging the school unfairly rejects minority applicants. The Alliance for Equal Opportunity in Education, a newly created group comprised of community leaders, alumni and student leaders, held a press conference to broadcast their grievances. One group member said, “[Black applicants] have been accepted at UC Berkeley, they have been accepted at USC, they have been accepted to top campuses across this country and yet we find some of those same students have been denied at UCLA.” At this point, the 96 Black incoming freshmen must feel like Ruby Bridges.