White Men Behaving Badly in a MultiCultClassics Monologue…
• Coors Chairman and commercial spokesperson Peter Coors (pictured above) was nabbed for drunk driving, according to The Denver Post. The arrest took place on May 28, after Coors rolled through a stop sign and cops determined his blood-alcohol level was over the legal limit. “I made a mistake,” admitted Coors. However, it was later learned that the statement referred to having greenlighted the Silver Bullet Love Train campaign.
• Michael Jackson’s ex-wife is seeking $250,000 from the King of Pop, which she’ll use to pay legal fees to continue suing him for child custody. You know things are getting bad for Jacko when he’s bankrolling defense and prosecuting attorneys.
• Former American Idol contestant Daniel James “DJ” Boyd is facing child pornography charges after being accused of videotaping sex acts with teenage girls. Maybe he was just emulating his idol, R. Kelly.
• Intel Corp. is slashing 1,000 management jobs, and the company may cut 9,000 more workers in the next six months. An Intel spokesperson said, “Our analysis shows that we have too many management layers from the top of the company to the first line of supervisors to be effective.” Now the chip manufacturer will probably compensate with illegal immigrants or sweatshop labor.
• Wal-Mart announced new policies regarding shoplifting at its stores. The mega-retailer will no longer prosecute all thieves, opting to pursue legal action only in cases involving lifting over $25 in merchandise. Look for at least 1,000 ex-Intel managers to visit the nearest Wal-Mart soon.
“However, it was later learned that the statement referred to having greenlighted the Silver Bullet Love Train campaign”
ReplyDeleteOuch, but true. And those damn, “Pass, pass, pass the cold Coors light” radio spots.
“...opting to pursue legal action only in cases involving lifting over $25 in merchandise”
Good luck to them then, since everything’s $4.88 and under.