Essay 817

Rapper battles and assorted bitch-slappings in a MultiCultClassics Monologue…

• The feud between 50 Cent and The Game has dropped another level, as Fiddy released the mixtape depicted above. Talk about hitting below the belt. The Game responded gamely by saying, “G-Unit got a new mixtape out, got me dressed up like a stripper, it looked kinda cute. But, the motherfuckin’ Game don’t do no stripping.” Guess the continued battling won’t be G-rated.

• Eminem is being accused of attacking a man at a Detroit strip club. The altercation took place in the club’s bathroom, after the alleged victim complained to Eminem’s bodyguard about telling another patron to shut up. “Eminem got done [using the bathroom] and boom,” said the 48-year-old victim. “He started swinging. I wasn’t even expecting it. I was just minding my own business and taking a leak.” Better watch your P-Unit around rappers.

• Peter Coors had his driver’s license revoked as a result of his DUI stop (see Essay 808). No word yet if he’ll lose his liquor license too.

• An AP-Ipsos poll revealed most Americans check food labels, but will buy and consume stuff even if the labels offer bad news. Hey, “America Runs On Dunkin’” is sounding more prophetic every day.

• A gay ex-employee is suing rental car company Hertz, saying he was repeatedly sexually harassed during his 11-year tenure in Manhattan. “I was given pornography during work hours,” said ex-worker. “I was called by an effeminate name. I was groped. It was horrible.” The charges also include accusations of racial discrimination, where Black and Hispanic male employees were called names like “Shamequa” and “Beyoncé.” The ex-employee claims, “It was totally wrong and inappropriate. My name was ‘Sade.’” Hertz probably thinks the ex-employee is a smooth operator.

• The Detroit News reported that Ford plans to fire up to 24,000 employees by the end of the year. It’s all part of the company’s turnaround effort, which employees are probably calling “Cold Moves.”

• NAACP President Bruce Gordon announced that 1,000 members will head to Capitol Hill to confront senators on the Voting Rights Act. “My hope,” said Gordon, “is that for the first time in his administration, the president of the United States will see fit to join the oldest and largest civil rights organization when the Voting Rights Act is on the table.” The ex-Verizon executive then probably added, “Can you hear me now? Good.”