5337: First-Class Foolishness.

Flying through the news in a MultiCultClassics Monologue…

• I’m Lovin’ Tit. Mickey D’s doled out $505,000 to four ex-employees in Colorado to settle a sexual harassment suit. The women claim a then 24-year-old manager routinely bit their breasts and squeezed their buttocks. That doesn’t sound like any Extra Value Meal on the menu board.

• American Airlines cancelled about 500 flights to inspect and repair wiring in the wheel wells of 300 jets. The groundings affected up to 40 percent of the airline’s passengers. The company’s tagline is, “We know why you fly.” They apparently don’t know why their planes can’t fly.

• Naomi Campbell has been grounded by British Airways, as the airline banned her for assaulting cops at Heathrow Airport. The airline probably suspects the supermodel has faulty wiring that can’t be repaired.