6101: Cells, Cellphones And Selling.

Doing time with a MultiCultClassics Monologue…

• Former Detroit Mayor Kwame Kilpatrick can look forward to 120 days in a jail cell like the one depicted above for lying about an affair with his chief of staff. “The Wayne County jail, and the cell Mr. Kilpatrick will be staying in, is no country club,” said the Wayne County Sheriff. “It’s a Spartan cell, cinderblock, typical of jail cells.” No word if he’ll be able to receive text messages.

• Verizon reported 3Q earnings were up 31 percent. However, expect a significant drop if Kwame Kilpatrick is unable to send text messages during the next quarter.

• Whirlpool announced plans to cut 5,000 jobs. It’s about time someone cracked down on the Maytag repairman, who hasn’t been doing anything for decades.

• UPS reported 3Q profits dropped 10 percent. Looks like Brown can’t stay in the black.

• Rev. Al Sharpton is mad at the New York Post for a sports column he considers racist. Sportswriter Steve Serby commented about New York Giants coach Tom Coughlin punishing player Plaxico Burress for assorted infractions. Serby wrote, “Good for Tom Coughlin. Good for Coughlin for tightening the noose around Plaxico Burress.” Sharpton declared, “To make such a blatant racist statement about an African-American football player with a neck injury is completely unacceptable. Clearly, the racial connotation is very disturbing. … This is the verbal reflection of a hanging noose.” Should be interesting to read the New York Post headline for this one.