9908: C’MON WHITE MAN! Episode 18.

(MultiCultClassics credits ESPN’s C’MON MAN! for sparking this semi-regular blog series.)

4A’s Agency Thought Leader Compensation Summit allowed a bunch of industry honchos to ponder payment plans between clients and agencies. The headline whiner was TBWA\Worldwide Global Director of Media Arts Lee Clow, who declared, “Unfortunately, in our business, we get paid like we’re doing our clients’ laundry. We haven’t figured out that the ideas that we create can become a very powerful asset to the brands we work for. Many of the ideas—whether they be slogans or advertising forms and styles or a voice that we create for brands—could be listed on the balance sheet of our clients as an asset with millions and millions of dollars in value.”

Gee, it’s always fun to watch a speech about being underpaid delivered by a multimillionaire.

If Clow is truly clueless about the compensation schemes fueling our business, he ought to call Omnicom CEO and President John Wren. Maybe Wren will explain how contracts, cronyism and Corporate Cultural Collusion stifle competition and ultimately turn advertising agencies into generic commodities. Why, just peep PepsiCo and Quaker Oats to realize Omnicom has effectively established that Goodby, Silverstein and Partners and TBWA\Chiat\Day are parity with Juniper Park and Fathom Communications. Plus, it’s a safe bet that Clow received stupid money when his shop was sold to the global holding company. Perhaps “we haven’t figured out that the ideas that we create can become a very powerful asset to the brands we work for” because folks such as Clow were too busy collecting their cuts from corporate mergers and buyouts.

But wait, there’s more. While the iconic White advertising agencies are paid like they’re doing their clients’ laundry, the minority shops are stuck fighting over the lint in the dryer filters. And that’s no ancient Chinese secret, Mr. Lee Clow.

C’MON WHITE MAN!