Saturday, May 30, 2009
6786: Hair-Raising News.
A few sentences in a MultiCultClassics Monologue…
• Phil Spector received a prison sentence of 19 years to life for murdering an actress. Let’s hope he finds a new hairstylist in the pokey.
• A Krispy Kreme factory in Virginia is being sued by Fairfax County officials who claim plant waste has messed up the area’s sewage system, breaking environmental laws and causing millions of dollars in damage. Krispy Kreme can probably get the suit instantly dropped by showing up at pre-trial meetings with boxes of doughnuts.
• Southwest Airlines plans to let passengers fly with small pets for an additional $75 fee. Large pets must be stowed in the overhead compartments.
• A local Pennsylvania newspaper apologized for running a classified ad calling for President Barack Obama’s assassination. The message read, “May Obama follow in the steps of Lincoln, Garfield, McKinley and Kennedy!” The paper’s editor said his staff failed to catch the historical connection. Do they award Pulitzer Prizes for extraordinary ignorance?