Essay Ninety-Three

Second thoughts with MultiCultClassics Minutes…

• Now the Little League umpire who ordered Hispanic players to stop speaking Spanish during a game has been silenced. League officials barred him from working more games in the current state tournament. Hasta la vista, ump. Enjoy your 15 minutes of infamy.

• Don’t mess with Charlie’s Angels. Cameron Diaz has been awarded a substantial-albeit-undisclosed amount of loot from a tabloid that ran a false story about her. Now she’s going after another scandal sheet that ran a similar fib. Diaz was also victorious in her court battle with a photographer trying to sell topless photos of the starlet. Talk about jury box office success.

• The Buckeye State has gone buck wild again. Two teens in Fairfield, Ohio were arrested for burning 20 U.S. flags that were commemorating a soldier who died from injuries sustained in Iraq. The delinquents allegedly did not know the significance of the flags, but they did manage to ignite them under the car of the soldier’s sister-in-law, destroying it too. Remember, Ohio’s motto is, “With God, all things are possible.” Crazy things included.

• The July 25, 2005 issue of Advertising Age featured a Special Report commemorating McDonald’s 50th anniversary. In the report, McDonald’s marketing veteran Roy Bergold presented four decisions made during his tour of duty that he’d like to change. Among the things Bergold would do over: “One national agency responsible for everything, including ethnic and promotion. They can use any resources they wish, but this one agency has total accountability for all marketing programs.” Mergers may make Bergold’s pipe dream a reality someday, although the politics involved would be monumental and grotesque. Given McDonald’s current marketing chaos — with multiple shops creating fragmented messages whose only commonalities are mediocrity and awfulness — it’s no wonder Bergold bailed out.

• Also noteworthy in the Special Report mentioned above: McDonald’s ethnic shops were conspicuously negligent in presenting a tribute ad — Leo Burnett, DDB, Frankel/Arc, The Marketing Store and even Turner Entertainment delivered kudos. Whassup with that?