14839: Unsmoke Smoke-Free Campaign Is Smoke And Mirrors.

Shouldn’t propaganda campaigns like this be required to include warnings from the Surgeon General? Or at least indicate the messages are part of court-issued mandates, essentially reprimanding manufacturers like Philip Morris for covertly targeting youth with its advertisements and promotions?

7880: Smoking Out Kraft’s Big Tobacco Tactics.

MultiCultClassics has briefly commented on this topic before, but the latest press hype inspires additional ranting.

Kraft Macaroni & Cheese is targeting adults with an advertising campaign, and the effort seems to be spiking sales. This is obscene on a few levels.

First, Kraft allegedly reduced hawking its variety of unhealthy shit directly to kids, feigning concern for the well-being of America’s youngsters. Yet the food maker turns around and pushes its garbage on grownups. As if Kraft doesn’t realize adults will ultimately feed the stuff to children.

This becomes even more sinister when you consider Kraft’s past ties to cigarette maker Philip Morris/Altria. Big Tobacco has always been content with being prohibited from advertising to youth. But only because the companies know the easiest way to woo children is by peddling the addictive products parents. Seems like Kraft is taking a lesson from Big Tobacco—and contributing to the nation’s obesity problems.

Maybe it’s time to place Surgeon General’s Warning labels on Kraft food packages.

7256: What’s Happening?

Rerunning the news in a MultiCultClassics Monologue…

• Twitter has changed its format to ask, “What’s Happening?” Looks like another example of Whites hijacking Black culture. Roger and Rerun deserve royalty payments.

• Oprah announced plans to end her show in 2011 and start her own cable network, inspiring intense speculation over a potential successor. The list of contenders confirms a cold reality: there is no talent on daytime TV.

• AOL announced plans to dump one-third of its workforce. Ex-employees with cable experience are encouraged to forward their resumes to Oprah.

• Philip Morris was ordered to pay $300 million to an ex-smoker in Florida. Break out the celebratory cigars.

• A dad in Minnesota claims he originally taught his son to speak Klingon when the kid was 3 years old. The son is now 15, and probably wants to plunge a Daqtagh into his old man’s heart.

6084: Vice Makes Nice Profits.

Profits and propositions in a MultiCultClassics Monologue…

• Philip Morris reported 3Q profits puffed up 20.6 percent. Mickey D’s reported 3Q profits super-sized 11 percent. Now, if these corporations were to introduce the McMarlboro Cigarette Sandwich, they would probably rule the Earth.

• Wachovia reported 3Q losses at $24 billion. Shareholders will soon be eating at McDonald’s and bumming cigarettes from their peers.

• San Francisco is considering decriminalizing prostitution. Proposition K goes before voters next month, and the measure would prohibit local cops from investigating, arresting or prosecuting people for selling sex not involving minors. If successful, look for Wachovia to offer new banking services.