Friday, November 20, 2009

7256: What’s Happening?

Rerunning the news in a MultiCultClassics Monologue…

• Twitter has changed its format to ask, “What’s Happening?” Looks like another example of Whites hijacking Black culture. Roger and Rerun deserve royalty payments.

• Oprah announced plans to end her show in 2011 and start her own cable network, inspiring intense speculation over a potential successor. The list of contenders confirms a cold reality: there is no talent on daytime TV.

• AOL announced plans to dump one-third of its workforce. Ex-employees with cable experience are encouraged to forward their resumes to Oprah.

• Philip Morris was ordered to pay $300 million to an ex-smoker in Florida. Break out the celebratory cigars.

• A dad in Minnesota claims he originally taught his son to speak Klingon when the kid was 3 years old. The son is now 15, and probably wants to plunge a Daqtagh into his old man’s heart.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Fluent in Klingon ought to come in handy.