Essay 1004

Exposing the truth in a MultiCultClassics Monologue…

• Las Vegas strippers donated money to support a local school system. The loot was acquired via an event titled “Detention,” where the women dressed up — and undressed — as teachers, schoolgirls and librarians. The strippers managed to raise $2,500 — among other things.

• The IRS ended its 2-year probe of the NAACP’s tax status. The decision to investigate the group allegedly stemmed from the NAACP’s criticism of President Bush during the 2004 election. But now the IRS declared the civil rights organization’s remarks didn’t violate their tax-exempt status. NAACP President Bruce Gordon said, “It’s disappointing that the IRS took nearly two years to conclude what we knew from the beginning: The NAACP did not violate tax laws and continues to be politically nonpartisan.” The politicians probably would not have pressed for an investigation if the NAACP agreed to only accept donations from strippers.

• Rapper 50 Cent declared, “I actually like George W. Bush. In some ways, I’m the George W. Bush of hip hop — nobody likes me, but I’m still gonna run it for the next four years.” Democrats will probably ask the IRS to investigate Fiddy’s tax status.

• Former Village People cop Victor Willis has agreed to seek treatment following his plea to drug possession charges. So he’ll go from “In the Navy” to “In the Pokey” to “In the Betty Ford Center.”