Essay 405

A MultiCultClassics Monologue with an Extra Value Meal…

• Folks with food allergies — particularly parents with allergic kids — are McPissed to learn that Mickey D’s french fries contain wheat as an ingredient. This would make the fries a no-no for many sensitive kids. Actually, it would be more shocking to learn Mickey D’s fries contained potatoes.

• A North Carolina woman is suing Mickey D’s, claiming she found blood on her bag of french fries. “At first, I felt disbelief,” the woman said. “Then fear.” And that was before she even noticed the blood. Wait till she learns about the wheat.

• A bunch of angry Muslims, protesting the infamous Prophet Mohammed cartoons, set ablaze a Ronald McDonald statue in Pakistan. These folks probably would not be upset to discover blood on their Happy Meals. But don’t even think about including a Prophet Mohammed collectible toy.

• The Ohio parents that kept their adopted kids in cages were indicted along with their social worker. Wonder if child services will let the kids out of their cages to visit their soon-to-be-caged mom and dad.

• Oscar nominee Terrence Howard will not sing “It’s Hard Out Here for a Pimp” during the 78th Academy Awards show. Sounds like the perfect opportunity for Celine Dion.

• Jesse Jackson and Condoleezza Rice topped the list in an AP-AOL Black Voices poll for America’s “most important Black leader.” Colin Powell and Barack Obama also scored high. Then again, maybe Jesse and Condi could perform “It’s Hard Out Here for a Pimp” as a duet during the 78th Academy Awards show.