Essay 425

Dig this MultiCultClassics Monologue…

• Sen. Dianne Feinstein wants to make it a federal crime to dig tunnels between the U.S. and Mexico. Feinstein introduced a bill that would impose 20-year jail sentences for tunnel makers. Many tunnels have appeared in recent years, mostly used to smuggle drugs. Wonder if PETA will protest on behalf of groundhogs.

• The Minuteman Project has abandoned its attempts to participate in a Laguna Beach parade (see Essay 363). The group had sued to be included after the event organizers had rejected them. But a judge ruled against the anti-immigration group, so they’ve now set their sights on a San Juan Capistrano event. San Juan Capistrano residents are probably digging a tunnel to get out of town.

• A security guard at the United Nations was scolded for doodling swastikas on a log sheet that was ultimately seen by an Israeli guard. Additionally, officials recommended the offending guard attend sensitivity training. The guy could also probably benefit from being informed that he works at the United Nations.

• The Supreme Court unanimously overturned an appeals court decision regarding whether the term “boy” could be used as evidence of workplace discrimination. The appeals court said the word could not be evidence, but the higher court ordered them to rethink the ruling. Wonder what Justice Clarence Thomas really believed in this case.

• Taser International, Inc., producer of stun guns, saw its 4Q earnings plunge 98%. The company has been zapped with lawsuits that charge its products caused a number of accidental deaths. Plus, Vice President Dick Cheney has demonstrated that it’s much more effective to use a shotgun.