9320: Naomi’s Nipple.

Various news and online sources reported on Naomi Campbell’s wardrobe malfunction. Um, seeing Campbell’s nipple is news because…?

9319: More ADCOLOR® Agency Diversity Ads.

Thanks to the tipster who provided access to more ADCOLOR® commemorative advertisements—which inspired more MultiCultClassics one-liners.


Deutsch strives for the unique with a concept that is anything but.


Arnold staffers use one of the most overused lines in diversity advertising—and have the audacity to proclaim themselves great minds.


Did IPG put a gay pride flag through a shredder?


Rapp “thanks ADCOLOR® for making diversity mean more than it used to,” yet fails to clarify what the hell that means.


The best ads were produced by minority agencies Améredia and Dieste. Imagine that.

9318: Super Mediocre Illustration.

This Sheridan College ad reads:

It’s competitive out there. Standing out in fields like animation and illustration can be an epic undertaking. Fortunately, a Sheridan education gives you an almost superhuman advantage. With unparalleled studio time and a world-class faculty, our programs are designed to power you to the top of the creative industry.

Holy Moly! Based on the quality of the illustration, Sheridan graduates aren’t qualified to draw storyboards. Even for Draftfcb.

From Ads of the World

9317: ADCOLOR® Agency Diversity Ads.

MultiCultClassics doesn’t regularly read the print edition of Adweek anymore, and missed the agency advertisements commemorating the latest ADCOLOR® soiree. As a result, the images below were lifted from copyranter, who was actually quite generous in his appraisal of the work. Perhaps he graded the stuff on a bell curve. Anyway, here are MultiCultClassics’ one-liner reactions.


This TBWA ad is all just a bunch of fuckingshitcontriveddamnhackneyedcocksuckingclichédasslickingcrap.


What?! Draftfcb CEO Laurence Boschetto is a Bostonian?!!!


Called this one in 2009.


Wonder if BBH bought a table at the gala diversity event and left it unattended.

9316: Contextual Cluelessness.

Advertising Age presented “Why Omnicom Opts Out of Digital Spotlight”—beside a banner ad featuring DDB Chairman Bob Scarpelli in The Yahoo! Futurist Series, which promises to show where digital advertising is heading.

9315: Adweek Tells Readers, “Bite Me.”

In the latest edition of Adweek—the Food issue—Padma Lakshmi appears to be literally and figuratively giving readers the finger. It’s as if she’s saying, “Looking for advertising-related content? Fuck you.”

9314: Madison Avenue Loves Racist Humor.

Likely responding to the Advertising Age story on Omnicom’s moves in the digital arena, a prankster drafted a fictitious letter from John Wren. Mimicking messaging by Netflix, the missive mocks the Omnicom CEO. All the insider references indicate a current or former Omnicom employee probably created it. Anyway, the letter takes an ugly turn, serving up plenty of racist remarks. Can’t help but wonder how well the fake memo represents the typical Omnicom drone. And it appeared just days after the Omnicom Chief Diversity Officer’s annual lovefest. Nice.

9313: More Unity For Unity.

From The New York Times…

Newsroom Diversity Groups in Partnership

By Tanzina Vega

Unity: Journalists of Color, an organization whose goal is to promote newsroom diversity, is forming a partnership with the National Lesbian and Gay Journalists Association, the two groups announced Monday. This will be the first time that the lesbian and gay association will be on the board of Unity, and it will participate in the Unity convention in Las Vegas in 2012.

The announcement follows a tumultuous few months for Unity after a decision by the National Association of Black Journalists, the largest of the four member organizations, to withdraw from the alliance in April. The two organizations are discussing the possibility of reunification for the 2016 Unity convention.

The other organizations in Unity are the Asian American Journalists Association, the National Association of Hispanic Journalists, and the Native American Journalists Association.

“As the media landscape changes and as there are new and different stresses in the organizations, there’s definitely value in working together,” said David Steinberg, the president of gay and lesbian journalism group. “On a fundamental level we are committed to the same goals.”

Mr. Steinberg said that for his organization those goals included providing fair and accurate coverage of lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender people in the media, increasing diversity in newsrooms, opposing newsroom bias and providing occupational training to its members, he said.

In a statement, Joanna Hernandez, the president of Unity, said: “Our alliance will be stronger with NLGJA on board. It expands our mission to embrace diversity broadly, which is a logical progression for UNITY.”

Mr. Steinberg said that while the lesbian and gay group had good attendance at its last conference in Philadelphia – national membership is estimated at upward of 600 – it had also faced financial struggles and declining membership numbers.

Mr. Steinberg’s group will have four seats on the executive board of Unity, bringing the total number of board members back to 16, after the withdrawal of the black journalists association. That organization will hold its own conference in New Orleans in June.

9312: Farmers & Tailors.

WTF—is that Professor Burke measuring the dude’s pants?

9311: Sundry Thoughts On Madison Avenue.

The New York Times Advertising Columnist Stuart Elliott wrote a report titled, “Uncertainty on Wall Street, Big Deals on Madison Avenue,” spotlighting the business maneuvers taking place in the industry. Pointing to recent acquisitions and mergers, Elliott concludes, “Madison Avenue is, by and large, in better shape than many of the industries for which it creates ads.” It’s an optimistic perspective, likely reached after reading too many puffery-filled press releases from the holding companies and agencies. As a public service—and because it’s a slow news day—MultiCultClassics will offer a rambling, glass-half-empty counterpoint.

Can’t help but think that the acquisitions and mergers are mostly a sign of desperation. In lieu of creating a new or even enhanced business model for the traditional advertising practices, the wonks running holding companies and agencies are simply acquiring digital and below-the-line enterprises. Then they are probably cooking the books to create an illusion of profitability, when it’s actually just a matter of the cheaper disciplines subsidizing the dinosaurs.

As MultiCultClassics has noted in past posts, experts have consistently shown that organic growth is far more successful than growth by acquisition and merger. Hell, WPP Overlord Sir Martin Sorrell
pretty much admitted it a few years ago. Can anyone identify successful combinations orchestrated in the last decade? The winners are definitely outnumbered by the total disasters.

The digital acquisitions and mergers are nothing more than reruns of the greedy mistakes of the 1980s and 1990s. Can anyone show how, say, Digitas and Razorfish have improved Publicis Groupe? Plus, have Digitas and Razorfish flourished in the network? Integrating interactive capabilities with traditional advertising is an illusion, as the two operate off of entirely distinct business models, with entirely distinct P&Ls. Agencies like Draftfcb have never honestly made good on the notion of a “new model of holistic communications expertise offered under one P&L,” and there’s no reason to believe things will be better when introducing digital to the big agency picture via acquisition or merger.

A story in the Fall Edition Digital Issue of Advertising Age featured a quote that sums up the truth:

“I love the promise of [the integrated agency]. I love the idea in theory,” said Shiv Singh, global director of digital for PepsiCo beverages and former Razorfish exec. But, he added, “I don’t think anyone is truly there in reality.”

Hey, no one is truly there is fantasyland either.

Other factors possibly fueling the misperception that our industry is “in better shape than many of the industries for which it creates ads” involve the side deals and schemes hatched by the holding companies. For example, IPG was able to semi-offset Draftfcb’s catastrophic loss of the SC Johnson business by selling some Facebook shares. Other networks and agencies quietly profit from real estate ventures and renting out office space no longer used by shuttered shops. Indeed, there are lots of non-advertising-related ways to generate revenue. Let’s face it, the typical Mad Man would engage in human trafficking of blood relatives to meet quarterly earning figures.

The biggest indicator of the state of affairs on Madison Avenue can be scanned via the classifieds and job sites. Most places are seeking digital workers—primarily designers—for bargain-basement wages. Few advertising agencies are hiring. Plus, so many shops seem to have a revolving door for senior-level creative leadership. Digital shops seek people with conceptual skills to supplement interactive expertise. Advertising agencies seek people with interactive skills to supplement conceptual expertise. Yet the overall quality of the work doesn’t seem to be moving forward.

Of course, the dialogue surrounding mergers and acquisitions is devoid of diversity. When you add a predominately White place with another predominately White place, well, do the multicultural math.

9310: More Miller Lite Man Up Mediocrity.

The Miller Lite “Man Up” campaign continues to astound with its awfulness—and the Black spots are particularly pathetic. “Texting” deserves to be titled, “WTF.” Meanwhile, “Man Card” should be declined.

9309: ANA + AAF = ASS.

News sources reported the Association of National Advertisers and the American Advertising Federation have joined Big Tobacco in the legal fight to oppose new cigarette warning labels being proposed by the Food and Drug Administration. The labels feature graphic images including a smoker’s corpse and diseased lung. Technically, this is old news, as the organizations have publicized support for cigarette makers for many months—and MultiCultClassics has even responded to the corporate hucksterism. This latest press coverage, however, contains a quote worth examining:

“The new cigarette warnings are expressly designed to be propagandistic rather than informative,” wrote the groups who represent hundreds of U.S. companies and thousands of advertising professionals. “If the government can deputize tobacco companies through their product packaging and advertisements to deliver its message, there is no reason it could not do so for other things—and history shows it will not hesitate to do so.”

Regarding the accusations that the labels “are expressly designed to be propagandistic rather than informative,” well, no duh. Yet it’s difficult to understand why Big Tobacco, the ANA and AAF are worried. The FDA has already stated the current “informational” approach doesn’t work. Everyone should know by now, however, that the gruesome stuff doesn’t really dissuade smokers either. For example, anti-smoking campaigns—most of which are funded by Big Tobacco lawsuit settlements and ultimately approved by cigarette makers—always display victims with holes in their throat, corpses and diseased lungs. And it all runs with Big Tobacco’s blessing. Why? Because Big Tobacco realizes it doesn’t adversely affect sales and usage. To suddenly act outraged that such images might appear on cigarette packs is a little disingenuous. Besides, Big Tobacco has constantly generated propaganda while concealing information from the public. So maybe it’s time for the FDA to turn the tables and try different tactics.

Love the paranoia-inducing whine about government ultimately deputizing “other things—and history shows it will not hesitate to do so.” Hey, governmental intervention wouldn’t be necessary if advertisers and their agencies weren’t such a bunch of lying, deceptive assholes—as history has repeatedly shown.

Advertising groups join cigarette label opposition

By Michael Felberbaum, AP Tobacco Writer

RICHMOND, Va. — Two advertising industry groups on Friday joined some of the nation’s largest tobacco companies in opposing new graphic cigarette warning labels that include the sewn-up corpse of a smoker and pictures of diseased lungs.

The groups say the labels infringe on commercial speech and could lead to further government intrusion if unchallenged.

The Association of National Advertisers and the American Advertising Federation on Friday filed briefs with the U.S. District Court in Washington, D.C., in a lawsuit led by R.J. Reynolds Tobacco Co. and Lorillard Tobacco Co.

The companies sued the Food and Drug Administration last month to block the labels, saying they violate free speech laws, unfairly urge adults to shun their legal products and will cost millions to produce.

A hearing on a preliminary injunction to stop the labels, set to appear on packs next year, is set for Sept. 21, with a decision to come as soon as October.

“The new cigarette warnings are expressly designed to be propagandistic rather than informative,” wrote the groups who represent hundreds of U.S. companies and thousands of advertising professionals. “If the government can deputize tobacco companies through their product packaging and advertisements to deliver its message, there is no reason it could not do so for other things—and history shows it will not hesitate to do so.”

Tobacco companies are increasingly relying on their packaging to build brand loyalty and grab consumers. It’s one of few advertising levers left to pull since the government has curbed their presence in magazines, billboards and TV.

In opposition to the lawsuit, the FDA said last week that the public interest in conveying the dangers of smoking outweighs the companies’ free speech rights. And it said the cost to the companies to incorporate the new graphics is not sufficient to halt the labels.

The federal agency also argued that Congress gave it the authority to require the new labels because existing warnings dating to 1984 were going unnoticed. It says it drew on the advice of various experts to create the labels, which the FDA said are similar to those used in other countries, including Canada.

The companies on Friday responded that while the government has authority to mandate them to accurately warn consumers about the dangers of their products plainly and legibly, it “lacks authority to compel manufacturers to replace their product labels and logos with emotionally-charged photographs and messages demanding that adult customers stop using their lawful products.”

In June, the FDA approved nine new warning labels that companies are to print on the entire top half of cigarette packs, front and back. The new warnings, each of which includes a number for a stop-smoking hotline, must constitute 20 percent of cigarette advertising, and marketers are to rotate use of the images.

One label depicts a corpse with its chest sewn up and the words “Smoking can kill you.” Another shows a healthy pair of lungs beside a yellow and black pair with a warning that smoking causes fatal lung disease.

Joining R.J. Reynolds and Lorillard in the suit are Commonwealth Brands Inc., Liggett Group LLC and Santa Fe Natural Tobacco Company Inc.

Altria Group Inc., parent company of the nation’s largest cigarette maker, Marlboro maker Philip Morris USA, is not a part of the lawsuit.

The tobacco industry’s legal challenge could delay the new warning labels for years. That is likely to save cigarette makers millions of dollars in lost sales and increased packaging costs.

9308: Can State Farm Jingle Make Douche Vanish?

One of the most hated guys in advertising is back, and now he’s
hawking dog food—with his trademark dog-shit-eating grin.

9307: Aflac Is Wack.

This new Aflac commercial is a sequel to the one with the duck breakdancing in the park. Except now everyone is rhyming. It demonstrates once again that White adpeople—and White ducks—love hip hop.


Plus, while searching for the spot, MultiCultClassics noticed Aflac is selling special wristbands with proceeds benefiting rescue and relief efforts for the recent Japanese earthquake disaster. Hey, did the idea for the promotion come from Gilbert Gottfried?

9306: Liya Kebede, Numéro Uno.

9305: What Is Robert Klara Smoking?

Consistently clueless Adweek reporter Robert Klara turns his limited abilities towards tobacco advertising. Is this guy taking a remedial marketing course via an online college, and turning his homework assignments into trade journal content? Klara’s examination of Newport advertising is laughable, as he wonders about the brand’s appeal to teens and Blacks. Yo, Robby, menthol smokes are the most addictive and lethal cigarettes. Do your homework, idiot.

9304: Trying to Define The Right Leaders.

Adweek published a story titled, “Is Michael Roth the Right Leader for IPG?” Can’t help but think the piece says a lot about the ad industry—as well as the state of affairs at Adweek.

First, Adweek makes generous use of cutting criticism from anonymous sources. Perhaps the new Adweek is the current AgencySpy after all. One quote is attributed to “an executive familiar with the top brass at IPG.” Um, that covers everyone from the C-suite officers to the receptionists. Other comments are linked to “a former top executive of an IPG agency.” Gee, can’t imagine who that might be. Then again, given the long line of bodies ejected by IPG in recent years, the list of suspects is quite extensive.

More troubling than Adweek’s deep dive into scandal sheet journalism is the story’s complete lack of references to advertising. It’s about stock values, financial figures, quarterly earnings, investment grades, etc. Nowhere does anyone discuss the work or the workers. And therein lies the true obscenity that holding companies have brought to Madison Avenue. Staffers are FTEs. Brands and clients are revenue generators. Billable hours trump big ideas. Agencies become generic commodities—run by ex-insurance salesmen and ex-wire shopping basket manufacturers. The new Mad Men are actually Money Men—although they remain predominately White.

9303: Semi-Defending Adweek’s Michael Wolff.

The New York Post continues to report on the alleged impending firing of Adweek Editorial Director Michael Wolff. The last time the newspaper speculated on Wolff’s demise, comments at AdScam noted a probable vendetta, as Wolff has been highly critical of NY Post owner Rupert Murdoch—plus, one of The Post writers is a former Adweek scribe, likely grinding an ax. Whatever. The ill-fitting wonk does deserve to be booted. And MultiCultClassics has hardly been a fan of the man. At the same time, The Post coverage seems extreme. Madison Avenue has seen C-suite executives bounced without a mention from the publication. Why waste column space on the editorial director of a third-rate magazine no one reads? Additionally, the remarks about Prometheus backer and Wolff hirer Jimmy Finkelstein are pathetic. The Post used an anonymous source to declare, “Finkelstein feels Wolff doesn’t have a handle on how to run an old-fashioned trade magazine.” Um, Wolff relaunched the mess by proclaiming Adweek is “not your father’s trade magazine.” Did Finkelstein ever huddle with Wolff prior to his appointment to discuss the plan for the future? Hell, with all the inept politics, Adweek is starting to resemble a typical BDA.

Wolff tracks seen

New editor eyed

By Keith J. Kelly and Claire Atkinson

Publisher Prometheus Global Media has started searching for a replacement for Adweek Editor Michael Wolff amid an internal back-and-forth over the direction of the company, The Post has learned.

Prometheus backer Jimmy Finkelstein, who hired Wolff to overhaul Adweek after several candidates turned him down, now thinks Wolff is a controversial highbrow who has alienated old-line Madison Avenue types, sources said.

One source with knowledge of the search said Finkelstein feels Wolff doesn’t have a handle on how to run an old-fashioned trade magazine.

Finkelstein, who also owns Washington trade The Hill, has been spending most of his time since he took over the CEO job trying to figure out how to return Adweek to its business-to-business roots, using his trade mag experience as a template.

Finkelstein and Wolff didn’t return calls seeking comment.

At the same time, there appears to be a tug of war between Finkelstein and another big backer, Guggenheim partner Todd Boehly, who invested in Prometheus together.

While Finkelstein focuses on a replacement for Wolff, sources said Boehly is busy shaking the bushes for a potential buyer for Prometheus, which also owns The Hollywood Reporter and Billboard magazines.

“Everybody is pretending that they are in control, when in reality nobody is in control,” said one source close to the situation.

Boehly denied any internal conflict and said that he has no intention of selling in the near term.

“I have a lot of passion and a lot of energy,” said Boehly. “We’re focused on building three big verticals in music, entertainment and advertising, all of which can be taken globally and digitally.”

While he heaped praise on the changes made at The Hollywood Reporter and Billboard, he said investors were still trying to figure out what to do at Adweek. He would not comment on the Wolff replacement talk.

Meanwhile, insiders say the internal environment has become far more difficult since CEO Richard Beckman was stripped in July of his day-to-day duties—taken over by Finkelstein—even though he kept the title and his lavish East Village office.

“I think all the owners have a love-hate relationship with one another,” said one insider.

Another insider was not so kind: “The Guggenheim guys are trying to get rid of Jimmy, and Jimmy is trying to get rid of Richard [Beckman].

Boehly insisted that is not the case.

“Guggenheim is not interested in getting rid of Jimmy,” he said. “We love Jimmy.”

And he said that Beckman, despite being stripped of the CEO responsibilities, is still very much involved in the search for new business.

Beckman has been scouring the globe to line up partners to extend franchises like the Billboard Music Awards, taken out of mothballs after five years and staged in Las Vegas on ABC show this year.

Last week, Beckman and Boehly were in Brazil. Beckman said he was still several weeks away from being able to reveal anything.

The executives all have their favorite titles. Said one source, “Boehly loves Billboard, Finkelstein loves The Hollywood Reporter, and nobody loves Adweek.”

9302: World’s New Beauty Standards.

Aevin Dugas of New Orleans was recognized for owning the world’s largest Afro, at a circumference of 4 feet and 4 inches. Chris “The Dutchess” Walton of Las Vegas scored for having the world’s longest nails with roughly 20 feet of nails on her hands. Looking forward to seeing the women in upcoming Black History Month advertising.