Tuesday, August 28, 2007

Essay 4387

Bathroom breaks in a MultiCultClassics Monologue…

• What’s with elected officials and public restrooms? Florida State Rep. Bob Allen was busted for offering $20 and a blowjob to an undercover cop in a park restroom last month (see Essay 4288). Now there’s news of Idaho Senator Larry E. Craig, who allegedly made sexual advances to an undercover cop in an adjoining toilet stall at Minneapolis-St. Paul International Airport last June. According to reports, Craig tapped his foot—a known signal to engage in nasty behavior—and also brushed his foot against the cop’s and repeatedly waved his hand under the stall divider. But the senator insists it’s all a misunderstanding. “At the time of this incident, I complained to the police that they were misconstruing my actions,” said Craig in a statement. “I was not involved in any inappropriate conduct.” Probably just signaling for extra toilet paper.

• Foxy Brown, currently penned up on Rikers Island for probation violations, filed a suit against the Correction Department in the hopes of gaining freedom. But a judge nixed the move. Foxy might get the attention of elected officials if she writes out a plea on toilet paper.


RFB said...

What IS with these guys?

What's more - why do cops bother going undercover to nab these dudes? Never mind the real crimes happening on the streets, we're spending your tax dollars giving you top stories of closeted gay politicians trying to get some anonymous toilet action.

It's official - again - twice - this country is fucked.

Anonymous said...

Plus, he's trying to get his lawyer now to say he signed a confession when he shouldn’t have?